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What Happens When The Words Stop? #WriteMotivation

mourningangelEmptiness.

That’s what I feel right now. Sorrow and emptiness. All because my head is silent.

It’s not that I’m lacking ideas. Boy do I have plenty of them. Sticky notes, scribbles in notebooks, scraps of paper, a Word document, and even something in EverNote designed for just that, ideas.

I’ve got plenty of story ideas. But that’s it. When I attempt to write them, I get words but the story never pans out. it feels like I’m forcing it and the energy, the desire, the creativity seems to leave.

I feel like I’m in mourning right now because of it. It’s like someone died. And I think they did. My characters, my ideas, my inspiration, possibly even my muse.

Or, maybe, she’s mourning the fact that I’m deaf to her words.

Whatever it is, I don’t like it. I’ve been trying for at least a month now. And I’ve always said a single word is progress. But it’s so hard to see anything like that right now. I may write a word or two here, a sentence or paragraph there. But they all sound force, trite, lacking emotion and imagination.

I’m angry. I’m sad. I’m sick of it.

I *want* to write again. I want to *feel*…something, anything when I do. Where has it all gone? Why did it leave?

I feel so alone without the voices talking…coherently. You could say I have abandonment issues.

So, how do I deal with…things…when this happens?

Behind the scenes I wallow in self-pity. This is definitely the wrong move. Misery begets misery. It feeds the negative voices. Making you plummet deeper into the abyss of sorrow.

Find the positive, in any situation, no matter how small.

Find the positive, in any situation, no matter how small.

Every day I fight to get out, clawing my way an inch at a time, hoping to see some light at the end. Sometimes, by the end of the day, I do. But by that time, my energy has been spent and writing, well…I think about it. Other times, I just consider tomorrow’s another day and wake up the next morning for another fight. (I truly believe that emotional exhaustion far outweighs physical).

I do this every day until I am so frustrated I have to call out. ย This is usually done on Twitter. Sometimes I will hit someone up on G-Chat. But, with everyone’s schedules so hectic and random, it’s really hard to get a response…especially at the exact moment you need it. (It doesn’t help that I have no local friends I could lean on). ย But I keep trying. Eventually I get cookies flung at me. And sometimes, I’ll get the boost I need. Or, at the very least, commiseration. Because, we are not alone!

I have to remind myself that just because I am asking for help, doesn’t mean I’m weak.ย I even posted about doing this but I’ve fallen back into my old ways of keeping it all bottled in. Silly me.

You know, if it weren’t for the support of my fellow #WriteMotivation folks, I’d have given up a long time ago.

So on to the July goals: (With the whole vacation/holiday at the beginning of the month, I guess I will be posting these on Friday)

1) Be Positive, Try to find the positive in every situation, no matter how small. This has got to be ALWAYS!!
Welp, yeah…um…see above. I’m doing the best I can. I’ve put together all my A to Z Challenge posts into one page for whenever you need some extra positive umph. Positive Post-It Notes. Bookmark it, visit it, revisit, and share if you are so inclined. I know I need to revisit it often! ๐Ÿ™‚

2) Cheer others on with #writemotivation cookie flinging and positive thoughts! Another ALWAYS!
Yeah, I think I’ve managed to fling more cookies at everyone I’ve been able to catch on Twitter. Visited the blogs and left comments. I do tend to miss a lot, so post away if I haven’t visited your site.

3) Continue writing SOMETHING, EVERYDAY! Even if I canโ€™t work on my novel, Iโ€™ll try my hand at short stories. Whatever it is, it has to be writing! DEFINITELY ALWAYS!
I’ve been writing. One word. One sentence. One paragraph at a time. (See above) Although, I am also trying to read more about plotting/pantsing/plantsing. Rebekah sent me this link after I told her about my current writer problems. And then this post happened over at The Fictional Ferrets. Very good timing I think. So, I am trying to learn a little. Sitting down and reading this stuff is definitely not my strong suit. Just like trying to study for a cert test at work, I can find a million other things I could be doing…like writing! But reading, learning, and writing are all writing related, right? Consider a win so far.

4) find something to blog about other than these Update posts. I’ve managed to accomplish this. Mostly, though, it’s been combined with the #WriteMotivation updates. Hope you don’t mind.

5) read another book. In the process of reading now.

6) Continue submitting my short story, โ€œO.N.โ€ Iโ€™ve got 3 rejections, letโ€™s see how many I can get before someone accepts me.ย :)ย Story is still on sub. Waiting to hear back before I can send it out again. In the meantime, I might try polishing up S.S. for doing the same.

******************

Do you ever feel like the words just don’t come? Go silent? Have a bajillion ideas, but they never pan out when you do try to write them. Feel like you have to force the words out and then hate every single one of them?

How do you handle it? What do you do to combat this?

LadyJai

21 Comments

  1. Ping from Michelle:

    Awhile back, I read a quote from a writer about how some days the writing was easy, and other times it was a struggle to even get a few words on the page. However, he said when he went back to edit, he couldn’t tell which words came from which days.

    That always makes me feel a little better on the days when it just feels like I can’t write ANYTHING: the knowledge that when I go back to it, I probably won’t be able to tell which days were the terrible days and which days were the good ones. It’ll just all be a story. ๐Ÿ™‚

    *hugs* All that to say: You’ll make it through this! I have the faith.

  2. Ping from Valerie Lawson:

    i don’t know if this will help but maureen mcgowan wrote what i think is an excellent post about writer’s block just this past week : http://www.maureenmcgowan.blogspot.com/2013/07/on-writers-block.html.
    big hugs .

  3. Ping from Amy Ravenel:

    I don’t know what I can say to make you feel better, but I do believe there is a light at the end of the tunnel. I know when I get frustrated, it helps me to go out – take a walk or window shop. It feels good to breathe fresh air. Or I’ll call a friend and chat. Or watch a movie with some pretty men in it. ๐Ÿ™‚

    • Ping from LadyJai:

      I feel so guilty doing anything but writing when writing is what I want to be doing but can’t. I guess I should get over that!

  4. Ping from Candace Gauger:

    I feel your pain. I have this beautiful story idea and the words just won’t come. I can’t hear the characters at all. Really, the only characters I can hear are for more erotic style stories and I’ve written tons about her and her ‘business’. The rest of the cast in my head need to tie and gag her so others can have their turn. But, even then, there’s nothing.

    This is like the dry spell with my art. Not even a simple doodle is able to break the block.

    Relax, have some fun, and don’t think about the words. Look elsewhere for a while and let the writing go by the wayside. You’ll know when you’ll be ready to tackle it again and the words will come freely once again.

    • Ping from LadyJai:

      Yeah, I’m actually re-writing/editing a different short story now. Hopefully the other one I was working on will hit me like a ton of bricks soon! ๐Ÿ˜€

  5. Ping from Angela Brown:

    Sometimes, it is time to step back to focus on the other things in life, to write a little and live a lot. To force the words sounds like it may not be the best route and so I urge you to live, love and allow the words to come from the muse when she comes out of hiding or opens up to pour her story through you ๐Ÿ™‚

  6. Ping from Jami Gold:

    Thanks for the link!

    I’ve suffered from writer burnout before and it’s not fun. I think I have a post with tips for recovery somewhere on my blog too. Feel free to check it out if you think it might help. *hugs*

    Good luck and know that you’re not alone! ๐Ÿ™‚

  7. Ping from M. Andrew Patterson (@M_A_Patterson):

    *tackles and covers in smooshes* ๐Ÿ˜€

    Seriously? I know how that feels. Been that way for a couple months. Some of mine is stress, some is fear of starting something new.

    I get it.

    You’ll get through this. I have faith in you.

    • Ping from LadyJai:

      it has to be stress…or my way of dealing with life? Then again, could be that inner editor and self-loathing speaking louder than it should. I need a very big stick so I can beat it down! ๐Ÿ™‚ *loves*

  8. Ping from Patricia (@plynne_author):

    I had two months were I couldn’t find the words. It was very frustrating. After a while, I told myself to try to relax and forced myself to stop fretting over it. I did my best not to worry about the fact I wasn’t writing. Then one day, it all came back. I guess my muse decided it was time for a vacation. Hopefully, that’s what your muse is doing too and she’ll start talking to you again soon.

    • Ping from LadyJai:

      I definitely need to relax. But sometimes I just want to write soooo bad, but nothing comes…or it just sux, which gets my inner-voice (the negative one) all riled up and yelling at me. Sometimes I listen. Shouldn’t but I do. :/

  9. Ping from Leigh Caroline:

    <3 *hugs* Trust me. We've been there, done that, come through the other side. I think it's a matter of finding WHY you write. One of the best horrible pieces of advice I ever heard was at my first convention. I went to a panel by some of the writers of Star Trek TNG, and one of them (I forget who) said something to the effect of "Don't write. Don't subject yourself to it. Why put yourself through all the crap?" And you know, at that point? I was really pissed off. Because who was he, who'd been involved in one of my favorite shows as a child, to tell a bunch of hopeful writers to quit? But then, I realized, that was exactly it. If you CAN quit, maybe writing's not something that needs to be a focus in your life. You have to find your reason to write. Not because others expect you to write, not because your friends want to read it. What is it about writing that makes you NEED to do it? Find that piece, and you'll find words again. <3

    • Ping from LadyJai:

      Quitting is easy. And I don’t want to quit. I love writing, even if no one ever sees it. But it’s that ugly negativity that resides inside me that rears it’s head from time to time and I end up listening. and I get lonely. ๐Ÿ™‚ <3

      • Ping from Leigh Caroline:

        That’s my point. Quitting is easy. What is it about writing that makes you take the hard route?

        • Ping from LadyJai:

          Because paper, pen, and words are my therapist. If I didn’t write, no one would listen…even if those words never see the light of day. It’s my best friend when I can’t talk to my best friend. It’s my emotional release. So I just need to shut that negative voice up and just write! LoL easier said than done sometimes.

          • Ping from Leigh Caroline:

            <3 *snuggles tight* Which means it needs to not become a source of extra stress. If the words don't come, trying to force it won't likely help, just stress you out. Try using paper instead of the computer, or a chalkboard/marker board, doodling and maybe playing scrabble or something. ๐Ÿ˜› You'd be amazed, sometimes you just need to loosen up your subconscious.

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